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  • Writer's pictureChris Siders

breatheslow. Liner Notes x Music Video

Updated: Jul 2, 2023




Photo by Stephanie Di Girolamo


For breatheslow I actually made the beat and first verse end of February. Conceptually and sound wise I wanted to go for something more lighter, while breaching on a subject lyrically I always wanted to talk about: my vices.


Everyone has a vice. I am no different. Some maybe food, drinking, drugs etc. one of mine is actually lust. I’m not super sexually active at all. However, when my pops passed away, I did start to participate more. I was running. This song about acknowledging the use of vices, as I used them to run, and my frustrations with control. I used to be a huge control freak, micro-managing people. Nowadays I calmed down understanding how everyone operates differently and that’s okay. I can’t expect for everyone to maneuver or navigate how I do.


The chorus is a reminder to breathe and let things run it’s course. Reliving the stress as you dance to this groovy jazzy alternative rap tune.


The first half of the first verse, I mentioned my drug addiction past along with the lust vice. The drugs occurred when I was in college on anti-depressants. My mood swings was massive and took my anger out on people closest to me. Second half I talked about my issues with vulnerability. Leaning on myself, being scared to lean on my support system. Being embarrassed I had an emotional and mental breakdown in front of a loved one when my Dad was passing away.


The second verse is about regaining power and not hold myself back or allow the environment I’m in or the circumstances I’m in to define my power. Our worthiness isn’t define by validation. Not the awards. Significant other(s). Family etc.


I have a problem with putting people’s feelings over my own, so I developed the habit to hold mine in for the sake of everything being resolved as swiftly as possible. Not understanding things fester. I still hold a lot of resentment in regards to my recent situations and that’s because I’ve made the irresponsible decisions to dishonor my feelings and not share in a way the ignites healthy discussion. I put it all in the music, but nothing beats being interpersonal. So there’s a level of miscommunication or disconnection present.


Understanding how to be present in the moment, acknowledging feelings instead if finding something to run away can eliminate those issues.



Video shot and edited by Cosmo Free

Sound:


The bpm for the production is 97. I pulled inspiration studying blxst beats and Rich Spirit by Kendrick Lamar. Golden textures something vibe to and not create something with a serious undertone, but yet I’m still rapping.




As for the sample, I sampled the same artist for emanciaption (just two different songs of course.) I’m not going to reveal who I sampled. If you know, you know. They aren’t that hard to find honestly. I slowed it down by 50 percent and pitched up just a little bit.


Lyrics:


Breathe, slow

Let go

Breathe, slow

Let go

surrender control

is the goal

surrender control

is the goal


Fallen to my vices

temptations running rampant

so inciting

restless

Always into something

when we get to cuffin

when we get to fucking

I grieve different

Judgments clinginess

22 pill addiction

itching to

peel my skin off

so you’ll know

where my bones crackle

from within

taking steps

to amend

even from a distance

occasional miss yous

set adrift cause

a bigger issue

immature when

triggered

happy

sadness in late night

anxiety

will you and

everyone catch me

when I fall apart ?

embarrassed you seen

me scream

I can still hold it down

even through your eyes

what it seems

hotlines in cold thoughts

I exhaust

as I



I can be bad

all by myself

fuck validation

shit poison

to health

always on

the go

but never stop to think

run back

to situations abusive

to me

pennies for my nightmares

I strive to change

detaching from

All smiles

my ignorance safe

pay towards resentment

difficult to reconcile

with shadows

in muses

fuck a song

made my ex

into your

album of the year

no longer

bare feelings

for your fucking tears

If hurting means

to heal

then that’s what it is

what's what it is, uh

let go what

you can’t control

grandfather’s damage

suffocate my mother’s

breath control

on a interpersonal

I struggle to connect

and accept

that my soul

deserve more than

what it accepts


Listen to my new body of work, The Emancipation Of Chris Siders here


All songs produced by Chris Siders

Additional Production from Thandizar Easley

Features: Fran and Hank $weets

Mixed and Mastered by Nemesyzz Rigby




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